This weeks web comic. Bit of a rush getting it done today but its out. Seemingly everyweb comic has an inaniamte object as a snarky insulting cast member, Penny Arcades DivX, Ctrl+Alt+Del Zeke and so forth. Mine does not plan to have a real one.
Aperture Sciente wants to make it clear that your trusty Weighted Companion Toaster will never stab you in the back. In fact, it can not talk.
In the eventuality of it talking, the Weighted Companion Toaster's words shall be taken as blatant lies.
Aperture Sciente would like to remind our appreciated test subjects that the Weighted Companion Toaster can, and will, be used to toast slices of bread. Make sure to follow the approved size standards for bread slices as indicated in Chapter 42, Section 3, of the Operational Manual that WAS NOT GIVEN TO YOU.
Lastly, Aperture Science wants to make it perfectly clear that incorrect, or plain wrong, use of your Weighted Companion Toaster could result in regret. Please make sure you never, ever, under any circumstance, attempt to--*BBZZZZCRACKLE*--ur Weghted Companion Toaster.
The Apature science services would like to remind you that the Apature science weighted companion toaster will never threaten to stab and or harm you, in the advice that the Apature science weighted companion toaster does speak please disreguard its advice